Reason 1
To be continued.......
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Coming soon....
Reasons why you should only write your blog when your children are in bed.
Reason 1
To be continued.......
Reason 1
To be continued.......
Checking the watch, waiting for 2011
New Years resolutions are a jip. They don’t mean squat – they’re generally thought up about half an hour before 01 Jan and in the midst of a margherita induced enthusiasm.
This year I will live by commandments, but not 10 because that would be far too long to read – but 6. Six is a good round number.
They will be meaningful and make sense to my everyday life. They will cover the 5 main ‘food groups’ of life; love, family, money, sustenance and the internet.
Let me begin;
Thou shalt allow the wee ones to make some of their own decisions – it’s time to let go, they are 4 and 2 now – they have minds of their own – if they want to wear their PJs all day who am I to argue, Yoghurt for every meal? I’m in! Want to learn how to drive? Don’t ask your Father.
Thou shalt spend more ‘quality’ time with the husband – in 2011 I will no longer consider joint reading of the wee ones bedtime story as ‘quality couple time’, I will not consider scrolling through Coles online picking out the groceries as romantic, snapping my shoulder back into joint is not a massage and intimacy does not mean plucking my eyebrows in the bathroom mirror whilst he showers. That is all I will say on this – as I’m pretty sure my mother may read it one day.
Thou shalt not buy unnecessary items of clothing for the wee ones – next year I refuse to be sucked in by;
‘Spend $150 and get free postage’
‘10% off your 50th item’
‘Buy one get one completely useless accessory free’
‘We’ve got pretty things, lots of pretty things here lady with a credit card come here, chook chook chook chook……’
Thou shalt not commit to any detox, cleanse, weightloss challenge, dietry reform, exercise regime, soup/fruit/cheese/tinned tomato/gin only diets UNLESS I am coerced into signing a legally binding agreement. Nuff said.
Thou shalt not cyber stalk B grade celebrities anymore – come on we all do it – 2010 was the year for cyber scandal – how can you not spend time looking up twitter accounts, Facebook, Myspace, Formspring, Fingerpost (ok I made that last one up – but it’s good huh?). Excuse me a minute, I just need to get one last read of Kim Duthie’s blog in before I give it all up……
Thou shalt never use the term ‘Thou shalt’ again.
The end,
Happy New Year have a blasting 2011.
E
xx
This year I will live by commandments, but not 10 because that would be far too long to read – but 6. Six is a good round number.
They will be meaningful and make sense to my everyday life. They will cover the 5 main ‘food groups’ of life; love, family, money, sustenance and the internet.
Let me begin;
Thou shalt allow the wee ones to make some of their own decisions – it’s time to let go, they are 4 and 2 now – they have minds of their own – if they want to wear their PJs all day who am I to argue, Yoghurt for every meal? I’m in! Want to learn how to drive? Don’t ask your Father.
Thou shalt spend more ‘quality’ time with the husband – in 2011 I will no longer consider joint reading of the wee ones bedtime story as ‘quality couple time’, I will not consider scrolling through Coles online picking out the groceries as romantic, snapping my shoulder back into joint is not a massage and intimacy does not mean plucking my eyebrows in the bathroom mirror whilst he showers. That is all I will say on this – as I’m pretty sure my mother may read it one day.
Thou shalt not buy unnecessary items of clothing for the wee ones – next year I refuse to be sucked in by;
‘Spend $150 and get free postage’
‘10% off your 50th item’
‘Buy one get one completely useless accessory free’
‘We’ve got pretty things, lots of pretty things here lady with a credit card come here, chook chook chook chook……’
Thou shalt not commit to any detox, cleanse, weightloss challenge, dietry reform, exercise regime, soup/fruit/cheese/tinned tomato/gin only diets UNLESS I am coerced into signing a legally binding agreement. Nuff said.
Thou shalt not cyber stalk B grade celebrities anymore – come on we all do it – 2010 was the year for cyber scandal – how can you not spend time looking up twitter accounts, Facebook, Myspace, Formspring, Fingerpost (ok I made that last one up – but it’s good huh?). Excuse me a minute, I just need to get one last read of Kim Duthie’s blog in before I give it all up……
Thou shalt never use the term ‘Thou shalt’ again.
The end,
Happy New Year have a blasting 2011.
E
xx
Monday, December 20, 2010
Just a quick one.....
5 random Christmas observations
1. Glitter. Glitter is not a Christmas decoration. You cannot glue a bunch of that shit on some green cardboard and call it Christmassy ok? There is nothing Christmassy about a potential eye injury
2. Christmas driving – road rules do not apply in the month of December – it is WAY more important to get to the shopping centre and find a park closest to the door than to observe the road rules that pertain to the rest of the months. Plus red and green are Christmas colours – who am I to say which one is go or stop in December?
3. Christmas drinks – somehow they are way more potent than normal drinks. Buy yourself a beer and be careful because that sucker is twice as strong if you’re wearing a silly hat or some tinsel. So don’t be surprised if you end up singing ‘I’ve had the time of my life’ with your work colleagues whilst standing on a table. Don’t even get me started on Christmas hangovers – beastly!
4. Christmas spirit – comes in many forms, but none quite like the over zealous super excited check out lady in Big W/Target/K-mart – you need to bottle that stuff lady – I cannot understand how you manage to wear those dangly flashing earrings let alone be seen out in public in them – good on you, but please stop giving my kids candy canes, it gives them hyperactive indigestion.
5. Christmas shopping fever – the inability to stop yourself from buying random stocking fillers for the wee ones or spending up online because there is only one more shipping day before Christmas. It’s an affliction – but I am having to say to myself; ‘E, they’re going to love it, but where the hell are they going to put it?’
Ding ding merrily on high, Christmas fever has hit in our house – I love it, I hate it, I always want more of it.
To my amazing 4 followers – thank you! Have a very super lovely Christmas and I’ll be back into it before New Years to outline my 2011 ‘Commandments’ (because New Years Resolutions are jinxed....)
E
xx
1. Glitter. Glitter is not a Christmas decoration. You cannot glue a bunch of that shit on some green cardboard and call it Christmassy ok? There is nothing Christmassy about a potential eye injury
2. Christmas driving – road rules do not apply in the month of December – it is WAY more important to get to the shopping centre and find a park closest to the door than to observe the road rules that pertain to the rest of the months. Plus red and green are Christmas colours – who am I to say which one is go or stop in December?
3. Christmas drinks – somehow they are way more potent than normal drinks. Buy yourself a beer and be careful because that sucker is twice as strong if you’re wearing a silly hat or some tinsel. So don’t be surprised if you end up singing ‘I’ve had the time of my life’ with your work colleagues whilst standing on a table. Don’t even get me started on Christmas hangovers – beastly!
4. Christmas spirit – comes in many forms, but none quite like the over zealous super excited check out lady in Big W/Target/K-mart – you need to bottle that stuff lady – I cannot understand how you manage to wear those dangly flashing earrings let alone be seen out in public in them – good on you, but please stop giving my kids candy canes, it gives them hyperactive indigestion.
5. Christmas shopping fever – the inability to stop yourself from buying random stocking fillers for the wee ones or spending up online because there is only one more shipping day before Christmas. It’s an affliction – but I am having to say to myself; ‘E, they’re going to love it, but where the hell are they going to put it?’
Ding ding merrily on high, Christmas fever has hit in our house – I love it, I hate it, I always want more of it.
To my amazing 4 followers – thank you! Have a very super lovely Christmas and I’ll be back into it before New Years to outline my 2011 ‘Commandments’ (because New Years Resolutions are jinxed....)
E
xx
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
The 12 days of Christmas (and it's only the 7th.....)
I’m in love with Christmas – I would marry it in a heartbeat and pop out a thousand Christmas present babies if I could. It is indeed my favourite time of year – but this year I’ve come across a new phenomenon. The Christmas Spirit of the Toddler & Infant. They like Christmas too. They have different ideas which tend to revolve around ruining mine. They want to be in charge. I say no..... but can I stop it?
On the first day of Christmas I decided yes great, exciting let’s get the kids gee’d up about Chrissie, round up the Christmas books, pop on your Santa hat, get out the photo albums, lets talk and talk some more about Christmas. When the wee ones finally calmed down and stopped with the ‘Is it tonight? is it tonight?’ they went to bed at about 10.30pm. At approximately 10.32 I made the sage decision to next year perhaps wait until the week before Christmas to begin the Gee up.
On the Second day of Christmas the tree went up and came back down and went back up, the decorations were hung all on one side and the tears began as certain individuals found it a little difficult to understand that Mummy has final say on presentation and the laws of gravity tend to prevail.
On the Third day of Christmas the Advent calendar started to wear a little thin – I really really really don’t want to get up at 5am to all stand around and marvel at the freddo frog retrieved from the little pocket. Note to self – next year no chocolate before 7am, too late for this year the precedent has been set.
On the Fourth day of Christmas I began to mentally calculate the cost of all the ‘little presents’ that have to be purchased for various Child care centre parties and secret santas and random giving trees. At this rate I’m not going to have any money left to purchase the real presents (who am I kidding you totally know I bought them all in July.....) and the kids will have ‘present burn out’ before the big day. But worse, I realise that I’m getting all these gifts back so I need to make them useful or relevant – what was I thinking buying the ‘stacks o plastic little tiny things that get everywhere’ just because they come in an awesome Christmassy box???
On the Fifth day of Christmas the indiscriminate crying attacks began. Through a fog of confuddlement I comforted the wee ones as they choked and snorted about weird and inexplicable events. It took a while for me to connect the dots back to the early morning Freddo and the over use of the Myer Christmas carol CDs. Apparently you can have too much Christmas spirit and it can overflow and become a powder keg of emotion that can easily be sparked off by the dulcid tones of some crooner belting out 'White Christmas'
On the 6th day of Christmas we took the day off.
On the 7th day of Christmas the warnings of ‘Father Christmas is watching you know...’ met their unfortunate end as the older wee one declared he did not give a feshizzle (not his exact words) – I mean he had all these gifts already from the advent calendar and the Christmas parties and the people in the supermarket handing out noise toys and balloons.... I’ve lost control! I have created a mini Grinch!
So we’re going back to basics – imagine a scene where a big wall hanging advent calendar is rolled up and poking out of the rubbish bin, the dog is using a very flat Christmas tree as a lovely bed, wrapped presents are laid out in the street for people to help themselves to.
There’ll be no turkey, there’ll be no Ham – take down the lights, fold up the cardboard Father Christmas in his sleigh scene with the alternate flashing green and red lights and shiny Rudolph nose, carefully place the bejewelled baby Jesus back in his manger special edition box – Christmas is DONE!
Oh god, I’m totally kidding, can’t wait until 5am tomorrow to see what’s in the advent calendar............
*sniff* love you Christmas......
On the first day of Christmas I decided yes great, exciting let’s get the kids gee’d up about Chrissie, round up the Christmas books, pop on your Santa hat, get out the photo albums, lets talk and talk some more about Christmas. When the wee ones finally calmed down and stopped with the ‘Is it tonight? is it tonight?’ they went to bed at about 10.30pm. At approximately 10.32 I made the sage decision to next year perhaps wait until the week before Christmas to begin the Gee up.
On the Second day of Christmas the tree went up and came back down and went back up, the decorations were hung all on one side and the tears began as certain individuals found it a little difficult to understand that Mummy has final say on presentation and the laws of gravity tend to prevail.
On the Third day of Christmas the Advent calendar started to wear a little thin – I really really really don’t want to get up at 5am to all stand around and marvel at the freddo frog retrieved from the little pocket. Note to self – next year no chocolate before 7am, too late for this year the precedent has been set.
On the Fourth day of Christmas I began to mentally calculate the cost of all the ‘little presents’ that have to be purchased for various Child care centre parties and secret santas and random giving trees. At this rate I’m not going to have any money left to purchase the real presents (who am I kidding you totally know I bought them all in July.....) and the kids will have ‘present burn out’ before the big day. But worse, I realise that I’m getting all these gifts back so I need to make them useful or relevant – what was I thinking buying the ‘stacks o plastic little tiny things that get everywhere’ just because they come in an awesome Christmassy box???
On the Fifth day of Christmas the indiscriminate crying attacks began. Through a fog of confuddlement I comforted the wee ones as they choked and snorted about weird and inexplicable events. It took a while for me to connect the dots back to the early morning Freddo and the over use of the Myer Christmas carol CDs. Apparently you can have too much Christmas spirit and it can overflow and become a powder keg of emotion that can easily be sparked off by the dulcid tones of some crooner belting out 'White Christmas'
On the 6th day of Christmas we took the day off.
On the 7th day of Christmas the warnings of ‘Father Christmas is watching you know...’ met their unfortunate end as the older wee one declared he did not give a feshizzle (not his exact words) – I mean he had all these gifts already from the advent calendar and the Christmas parties and the people in the supermarket handing out noise toys and balloons.... I’ve lost control! I have created a mini Grinch!
So we’re going back to basics – imagine a scene where a big wall hanging advent calendar is rolled up and poking out of the rubbish bin, the dog is using a very flat Christmas tree as a lovely bed, wrapped presents are laid out in the street for people to help themselves to.
There’ll be no turkey, there’ll be no Ham – take down the lights, fold up the cardboard Father Christmas in his sleigh scene with the alternate flashing green and red lights and shiny Rudolph nose, carefully place the bejewelled baby Jesus back in his manger special edition box – Christmas is DONE!
Oh god, I’m totally kidding, can’t wait until 5am tomorrow to see what’s in the advent calendar............
*sniff* love you Christmas......
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Just had to get this out
It’s hit me!
Our generation, the X one – I think I finally understand ‘us’ and you know who we have to blame for a lot of our hang ups? 80s TV.
Let me explain. You watch any episode of the A Team, Murder She Wrote, Riptide, 21 Jump Street, LA Law, Airwolf or Highway to Heaven and you will see a formula that is so etched into our brains that we simply cannot fathom a life not lived this way
It’s this;
• Nice person has problem seeks assistance from Bad People
• Bad people do bad things to nice person,
• Nice person gets caught up in situation beyond their control
• Someone of note/maturity/authority steps in,
• Bad people laugh in their face
• Someone of note/maturity/authority catches them red handed or in a clever court room battle
• Nice person is vindicated
• They all live happily ever after except for bad person who reaps the consequences of their poor choices.
It’s so simple yet how often in real life do you see the bad people actually reap the consequences of their poor decisions? It could be because we’re not sure what someone ‘reaping’ something looks like or it could be that these days bad people get away with bad things!
The 80s TV syndrome, yes I’m calling it a syndrome now, became apparent to me over time because I found myself stewing on things long after events had taken place, reliving agonising moments of unfairness, pounding my fists on the table lamenting the injustice of it all. I’ve outlined the key protagonists that have affected me over the years in the hopes maybe this will help others come to terms with it all.
Bad drivers – they belong in the same category as bad people as far as I’m concerned. I want the option to pull someone over and explain to them why I beeped my horn and how the fact they stuck their finger up at me did not allow me to have closure. How often have you wished that you had a big screen on the roof of your car so you could type out your thoughts about their bad driving. That way Mr Bad Driver can read it and then humbly nod his head or give a wave when he realises the error of his bad driving ways? Or is that just me?
Rude fellow customers – yet again bad people. Why is it that rude fellow customer gets served first? Can’t the people behind the counter tell that they’re pushing in? I just want someone once to say ‘No, you’re a rude fellow customer, you just moved that persons trolley to get in front of them’ and wouldn’t it be nice if rude fellow customer acknowledged this with profuse apologies, then we could all have a communal laugh later as old friends in the 12 items or less line.
Old people - Now I don’t really wish to castigate an entire generation, but seriously, you guys think you invented good manners then why the hell don’t you ever use them? I want to explain to you that not saying thank you to someone or knocking into someone with your electric wheelchair or snatching is just plain rude. Do you just need reminding? Is it because your brain is old? Either way I want an apology.
There’s just no social justice in the world and I have been very definitely brainwashed by Michael Landon (love your guts) to expect it, nay require it to get on with my life without feeling disillusioned and disappointed all the time.
So buck up peoples - I want those who fake workers compensation claims to acknowledge the error of their ways, I want Pizza companies that trick you with promises of really cheap pizza but don’t note in big font the minimum purchase to publicly acknowledge their swindling ways. I really really want Telstra to consider a repentance and atonement department....... did I take it too far?
Anyway I have to scarper – gotta go apologise to the guy next door for the years of flicking the dog poos over the fence – hey you’ve got to live it to truly believe it, right?
E
Our generation, the X one – I think I finally understand ‘us’ and you know who we have to blame for a lot of our hang ups? 80s TV.
Let me explain. You watch any episode of the A Team, Murder She Wrote, Riptide, 21 Jump Street, LA Law, Airwolf or Highway to Heaven and you will see a formula that is so etched into our brains that we simply cannot fathom a life not lived this way
It’s this;
• Nice person has problem seeks assistance from Bad People
• Bad people do bad things to nice person,
• Nice person gets caught up in situation beyond their control
• Someone of note/maturity/authority steps in,
• Bad people laugh in their face
• Someone of note/maturity/authority catches them red handed or in a clever court room battle
• Nice person is vindicated
• They all live happily ever after except for bad person who reaps the consequences of their poor choices.
It’s so simple yet how often in real life do you see the bad people actually reap the consequences of their poor decisions? It could be because we’re not sure what someone ‘reaping’ something looks like or it could be that these days bad people get away with bad things!
The 80s TV syndrome, yes I’m calling it a syndrome now, became apparent to me over time because I found myself stewing on things long after events had taken place, reliving agonising moments of unfairness, pounding my fists on the table lamenting the injustice of it all. I’ve outlined the key protagonists that have affected me over the years in the hopes maybe this will help others come to terms with it all.
Bad drivers – they belong in the same category as bad people as far as I’m concerned. I want the option to pull someone over and explain to them why I beeped my horn and how the fact they stuck their finger up at me did not allow me to have closure. How often have you wished that you had a big screen on the roof of your car so you could type out your thoughts about their bad driving. That way Mr Bad Driver can read it and then humbly nod his head or give a wave when he realises the error of his bad driving ways? Or is that just me?
Rude fellow customers – yet again bad people. Why is it that rude fellow customer gets served first? Can’t the people behind the counter tell that they’re pushing in? I just want someone once to say ‘No, you’re a rude fellow customer, you just moved that persons trolley to get in front of them’ and wouldn’t it be nice if rude fellow customer acknowledged this with profuse apologies, then we could all have a communal laugh later as old friends in the 12 items or less line.
Old people - Now I don’t really wish to castigate an entire generation, but seriously, you guys think you invented good manners then why the hell don’t you ever use them? I want to explain to you that not saying thank you to someone or knocking into someone with your electric wheelchair or snatching is just plain rude. Do you just need reminding? Is it because your brain is old? Either way I want an apology.
There’s just no social justice in the world and I have been very definitely brainwashed by Michael Landon (love your guts) to expect it, nay require it to get on with my life without feeling disillusioned and disappointed all the time.
So buck up peoples - I want those who fake workers compensation claims to acknowledge the error of their ways, I want Pizza companies that trick you with promises of really cheap pizza but don’t note in big font the minimum purchase to publicly acknowledge their swindling ways. I really really want Telstra to consider a repentance and atonement department....... did I take it too far?
Anyway I have to scarper – gotta go apologise to the guy next door for the years of flicking the dog poos over the fence – hey you’ve got to live it to truly believe it, right?
E
Lets get started
As a mother of 2 small children I often find myself narrating my own life in my head, possibly as a way to stay focused but more like because I've watched way too much tv.
This narration has made me realise that I can quite easily transpose my thoughts into something useful, something handy, something like a blog
So here is my first helpful hint for the wider world
How to get through a day with Toddlers.
As soon as your husband/partner/parole officer steps out that door to go to work with the normal people you are left alone with the small ones. You've clocked on. Toddlers can drain you of your will to live so I have come up with what I consider the 5 daily milestones and how to get through them
1) Morning Tea
2) Lunch
3) Afternoon Tea
4) Dinner
5) Bedtime
"But that's just about food and sleep!" I hear you say. Don't underestimate the power of the tummy or clock watching is my response to you.
Morning Tea 10 am or 9 on a bad day......
Normally by this time you have at least 4 tasks that have been started but not completed. Half the washing is done, beds have had their doonas chucked on the floor so they can 'air', children are wearing pyjama bottoms but clothes on top and your half drunk cup of coffee has a fly floating in it because you've spent the last hour carrying your 2 year old back to the naughty corner for her 2 minute time out.
Whats the plan? Sugary biscuits - nothing keeps a toddler quite like a couple of Tim Tams, they can take up to an hour to devour! In that time you can get at least one episode of Modern Family or whatever you missed on tele last night in!
Lunch normally around 12 or once you've cleaned all the chocolate handprints off the white walls.
Unfortunately lunch can be more of a drawn out process than morning tea. There really should be at least 3 meal refusals before you relent and give them Nutri Grain again. Lunch is a time to sit with your children and talk over topics that interest them such as 'spreading the rocks from the garden all over the carpet' or 'the best way to find that screechy noise at the back of your throat'. Sometimes I like to practice sleeping with my eyes open - freaks them out and lets you catch a couple z's.
Afternoon Tea - repeat morning tea routine (if you actually remember afternoon tea that is)
Dinner One should always endeavour to have the children fed and bathed by 6pm. I think it's nice to aspire to the unattainable; it keeps you on your toes.
Dinner is a riot - literally. It's always a hard decision whether to bathe your toddlers before or after dinner. Is it worse to let them suck the sand out from under their fingernails during dinner or worse to put them to bed with a head of hair full of spaghetti?
tomayto - tomarto....
I have a rule - 'If it's brown wash it down, if it can wait don't debate' simply put - don't make more work for yourself and sheets are easier to clean than kids! I have nothing more to say about dinner - my therapist says we shouldn't go there yet.
Bed time! I always thought that kids were put to bed early because they are growing beings that need a good amount of rest. Not true - in a nutshell kids to to bed early because their parents have a nervous twitch, blood shot eyes and knotted hair by 4.30pm.
Bed time routines should be consistent. In our house they are consistently a huge fight. Where's teddy? I can't wear the Bob the Builder pjs they feel funny. I don't like that book. Read me 17 more please. I'd like a drink of water. I need to go to the toilet. Where's Daddy? Mummy why are you crying.......
Of course there is always the obligatory hugging around the neck so you wont leave the room, your top half is stuck on the bed whilst your bottom half is acting independently trying to escape out the door.
How many times should you let them get up after you've put them to bed? ZERO - tell them about the monster in the hallway - that will help them stay in their beds - it's for their own good really......
Once secured in their beds fast a nigh nighs you realise they really are little darlings, that and the fact you've left your daughter in the naughty corner for the last 4 hours......
*sigh*
IT'S OVER - well until tomorrow morning - or maybe 2am when they spew all the nutri grain and tims tams up............ I love that time of night after they've gone to bed, the end of the day, husband on his way home/should be home/should have been home 2 hours ago where the hell is he???? and all you can think of is the warm loving and nurturing embrace of a G&T.
So really I haven't helped anyone here, didn't provide any solutions, haven't come up with any groundbreaking toddler taming ideas - but hey there's always the next post....
E
This narration has made me realise that I can quite easily transpose my thoughts into something useful, something handy, something like a blog
So here is my first helpful hint for the wider world
How to get through a day with Toddlers.
As soon as your husband/partner/parole officer steps out that door to go to work with the normal people you are left alone with the small ones. You've clocked on. Toddlers can drain you of your will to live so I have come up with what I consider the 5 daily milestones and how to get through them
1) Morning Tea
2) Lunch
3) Afternoon Tea
4) Dinner
5) Bedtime
"But that's just about food and sleep!" I hear you say. Don't underestimate the power of the tummy or clock watching is my response to you.
Morning Tea 10 am or 9 on a bad day......
Normally by this time you have at least 4 tasks that have been started but not completed. Half the washing is done, beds have had their doonas chucked on the floor so they can 'air', children are wearing pyjama bottoms but clothes on top and your half drunk cup of coffee has a fly floating in it because you've spent the last hour carrying your 2 year old back to the naughty corner for her 2 minute time out.
Whats the plan? Sugary biscuits - nothing keeps a toddler quite like a couple of Tim Tams, they can take up to an hour to devour! In that time you can get at least one episode of Modern Family or whatever you missed on tele last night in!
Lunch normally around 12 or once you've cleaned all the chocolate handprints off the white walls.
Unfortunately lunch can be more of a drawn out process than morning tea. There really should be at least 3 meal refusals before you relent and give them Nutri Grain again. Lunch is a time to sit with your children and talk over topics that interest them such as 'spreading the rocks from the garden all over the carpet' or 'the best way to find that screechy noise at the back of your throat'. Sometimes I like to practice sleeping with my eyes open - freaks them out and lets you catch a couple z's.
Afternoon Tea - repeat morning tea routine (if you actually remember afternoon tea that is)
Dinner One should always endeavour to have the children fed and bathed by 6pm. I think it's nice to aspire to the unattainable; it keeps you on your toes.
Dinner is a riot - literally. It's always a hard decision whether to bathe your toddlers before or after dinner. Is it worse to let them suck the sand out from under their fingernails during dinner or worse to put them to bed with a head of hair full of spaghetti?
tomayto - tomarto....
I have a rule - 'If it's brown wash it down, if it can wait don't debate' simply put - don't make more work for yourself and sheets are easier to clean than kids! I have nothing more to say about dinner - my therapist says we shouldn't go there yet.
Bed time! I always thought that kids were put to bed early because they are growing beings that need a good amount of rest. Not true - in a nutshell kids to to bed early because their parents have a nervous twitch, blood shot eyes and knotted hair by 4.30pm.
Bed time routines should be consistent. In our house they are consistently a huge fight. Where's teddy? I can't wear the Bob the Builder pjs they feel funny. I don't like that book. Read me 17 more please. I'd like a drink of water. I need to go to the toilet. Where's Daddy? Mummy why are you crying.......
Of course there is always the obligatory hugging around the neck so you wont leave the room, your top half is stuck on the bed whilst your bottom half is acting independently trying to escape out the door.
How many times should you let them get up after you've put them to bed? ZERO - tell them about the monster in the hallway - that will help them stay in their beds - it's for their own good really......
Once secured in their beds fast a nigh nighs you realise they really are little darlings, that and the fact you've left your daughter in the naughty corner for the last 4 hours......
*sigh*
IT'S OVER - well until tomorrow morning - or maybe 2am when they spew all the nutri grain and tims tams up............ I love that time of night after they've gone to bed, the end of the day, husband on his way home/should be home/should have been home 2 hours ago where the hell is he???? and all you can think of is the warm loving and nurturing embrace of a G&T.
So really I haven't helped anyone here, didn't provide any solutions, haven't come up with any groundbreaking toddler taming ideas - but hey there's always the next post....
E
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