For the Glove of Children

I don’t want to sound cruel, but I’ve just spent the last half an hour trying to get a pair of gardening gloves on my eldest wee one so he could pick some lemons and I feel disappointed in his dexterity.

I like to think I’m a patient person, but seriously child, why do his fingers move independently from his brain? What is so hard to understand about gloves and the way they work??

I asked him to take two of the three fingers he had squeezed into one hole back out again, instead he took the thumb out of the correct spot.

I laughed at first, it was kind of funny, but for the love of lemons it was not funny after five minutes and even less funny after fifteen.

We did a practise run of pretending to put on a glove. I mimed like I have never mimed before, Marcel Marceau would have been proud, I even did the surprised face when my imaginary glove fit perfectly, four fingers and thumb nicely cocooned in their own make believe glovey goodness.

The wee one understood, displayed an appropriate amount of mirth at the necessary mimey moments, so we progressed to putting on the real glove

Slid it over his fingers and hand, he spread them out into their little boy finger sized homes and Success!

NO! Three empty finger holes and a boy with pincer hands..... That will do wont it? No, apparently not according to the inappropriately hysterical response.

3 deep breaths

Try again

Fingers in, fingers out, fingers in, thumb out, glove off, glove back on, fingers out, thumb in, glove off, glove on other side of room, glove retrieved, glove on, fingers squashed, glove off, glove used to wipe perspiration off face..........

Wee one now picking lemons with newly created fingerless gloves.